The Naming of Things
by Ooshka
Summary: AH Features characters from Homestay and Home for Christmas. Sookie and Eric discuss the family's names. How did Pam end up with hers? Rated M for language.


**A/N Hello again! Here's another story about the Kiwi Sookie from Homestay. This (very short) piece is for all of you who were curious about Pam's name. It's the future family again, and set a few months after the epilogue from Homestay. Hope you like it!**

**Disclaimer: Still not mine.**

SPOV

Eric walked into the kitchen as I was just closing up the dishwasher. "So what's Leesh's rabbit called again?" he asked.

"Bobby" I replied, pushing the buttons to start the wash program.

"Why the fuck is it called Bobby? Is that after Fat Bob?"

"Eric, I don't know why half the things around here are called what they are."

"You'd think she'd pick something more appropriate. Like Bugs."

"Would the kids even know who Bugs Bunny is?"

Eric went over to start the coffeemaker and looked thoughtful. "Um" he said, "No, I'm sure I've watched it with them."

I snorted. "Well it would be one of the more appropriate things you'd shown them. Seriously, was Lord of the Rings really such a good idea?" I started to get out the stuff for making lunches.

"It wasn't a bad idea, really. I just probably misjudged the, um, scariness, of…some of the scenes…" I could tell Eric really didn't want to admit to being wrong but it had not been a good idea to show that movie to a bunch of small kids. Bizarrely Pam had been mostly unaffected, maybe it went over her head, but Tray had wanted to sleep with us for a week and because he was there we got Sam and Pam too. Eric had huffed and grumbled about being pushed out of bed, but really he only had himself to blame.

"Anyway" he said, trying to change the subject "at least I could tell where the fish got their names from. Poor Nemo."

"Dory"

"What?"

"It was Dory that Stan liberated when the lid got left off the tank."

"Oh. Well what happened to Nemo?"

"I didn't realise every kid in the house was feeding him. Death from too much fish-food."

"Oh. Well at least he died happy."

I finished the lunches while Eric got the coffee ready and then I joined him at the kitchen table where he was reading the news on his phone. I took a sip of my coffee and said "Anyway, we can't really criticise anyone else's choice of names."

"Why not?"

"The rhyming thing. Pam was on about it again the other day. I think because she's starting school this year and she's a bit worried that everyone's going to tease her because her name rhymes with her brother's."

Eric looked thoughtful. "Yeah, it wasn't so bad when they were Samuel and Pamela. Maybe we shouldn't have shortened them?"

"Mmm" I took another sip of coffee. "They were bound to get shortened at some point. The worst thing is they use it against me now. It used to be when I called for one of them I had a fifty-fifty chance of getting the right kid. Now I don't get either of them, and when I track them down they insist they thought I was calling for the other one."

"That's kind of smart though."

"Yeah, but it's really annoying. Oh, and Tray decided to get in on the act the other day and when I asked him why he didn't come when I called he was adamant he thought I meant Pam because her name sounds like his. He didn't really believe me that it didn't."

"Yeah…" Eric thought for a minute and had some of his coffee. "Yeah, Tray doesn't always catch on the fastest out of them, does he?"

"No, I just hope he'll grow out of it though. All we need is him to turn out to be like Jason."

"He's not like Jason, is he?" Eric looked a bit worried. I loved my brother and I was a bit worried too.

"Um…sometimes. But a lot of the time he's not. I'm sure he'll be fine."

"Yeah."

"Felicia's like Jason sometimes and she's doing alright." Mainly because she had a streak of steel that was pure Lorena Compton, but I wouldn't say that to Eric.

"Yeah. Yeah, she is. She's really quite, um…clever sometimes." Yeah, I thought. Clever enough to figure out how to get stuff out of you. I knew that not all the money for the rabbit was her Christmas and birthday money. Some of it had to have come from Eric. But he was a sucker for her big blue eyes, and if that didn't work, she switched tactics and tried to interest him in a business proposition. She'd do alright in life.

We were quiet for a bit while we finished our coffees then I said "Anyway, we let you name the dog, and poor Ivan, that's what he ended up with. It's a terrible name! Just because you were reading that book on Russian history and he chewed your last phone."

"Ivan's a great name! Ivan the Terrible totally suits that mutt. You just don't know how to name dogs. Seriously Sookie, Dean? You can't call a dog Dean."

"I thought it was a good name." I did, he looked like a Dean. "Anyway, Sam agreed with me."

Eric leaned over and patted my hand. "When are you going to realise that Sam says a lot of things so you don't get upset?"

"He does?"

"Uh-huh. He's always very protective of you. He hates it when you're upset."

"Oh." It did kind of make sense. I'd even seen him take on Eric in my defence, and none of the kids were usually game to do that. It was nice in a way to know that Sam would always be there for me. And, although Tray had a bit less depth than Sam, I thought he would be too. I guess that was the advantage of having sons, I didn't think any of my daughters would really do the same. Amelia and Felicia were a bit ambivalent about me sometimes, and I suspected that if there was a choice to be made, Pam would run right over me to save her father.

Usually it took about three years before my kids figured out I was an idiot, and I started to get a lot of "Oh, Mum!', accompanied by sighing and eye-rolling, but with Pam I swear it started on the day she was born. She looked at me and I'm sure she was thinking she'd ended up in totally the wrong place. At least until she saw Eric. Actually, I think maybe she saw Eric first. Yeah, after that I was bound to be a disappointment, I guess.

"I still think it's a bit weird what Judith and Calvin named their last son" I said, still thinking about the name thing.

"What? Thomas?"

"No! Their last son. William! At least they call him Will, but even so. It's a bit creepy, don't you think? Being named after a dead uncle?"

Eric just shrugged. Yeah, OK. He liked Judith and Calvin but I guess he didn't care what they named their kids.

Eric stood up and put the cups in the dishwasher. I turned round in my chair to face him. "You know the name I don't get at all" I said.

"What?"

"Stan. Where the hell did Pam come up with that one?"

Eric gave me a funny look. Oh great, now he thought I was an idiot too. "You really…don't know?" he asked frowning.

"No. I always figured it must have come out of some book or something, but I've never found out which one."

"It's my father's name, Sookie."

Oh, shit. I guess because I wouldn't let Pam name the cat Eric she'd just gone back one generation, having never met her grandfather. "How did I forget that?" I asked. I wanted to say that maybe I'd blanked out that whole visit as a bad memory, but I didn't want to drag up anything too nasty for Eric.

Eric shrugged. "Baby brain?"

"Yeah, I don't think you can say that when my youngest is nearly at school!"

"Stop saying that! It depresses me."

I went over to him and put my arms around him. "She'll still be your little girl."

"Yeah, but I still don't want her to grow up."

"Well, she keeps saying she wants to stay with you forever, so maybe you'll get your wish. I can just see the pair of you living out your days in Pam's pink pastel palace while she lectures you to be nice to the cats and not get anything grubby."

Eric looked a bit worried. "Where are you?" he asked.

"Me, I'm long dead. Worn out by having too many children."

"Please don't die and leave me alone with Pam" Eric pleaded.

"Well, I'll try, but I can't promise anything. I think you might be stuck with Pam. I'm not sure you could cope with Amelia's theatrics and I suspect that Felicia will bugger off and do her own thing. You'll have to hope that at least one of the boys gets a nice quiet wife who won't mind looking after her father-in-law in his old age."

"Yeah" Eric said. "When do you think about all this stuff?"

"Oh, you know. When I'm ironing and stuff. Which I'm about to do now, so go and get the shirt you want to wear tomorrow if you want me to iron it for you." I stepped back from him and patted him on the bum to send him on his way.

EPOV

I headed off to the bedroom and ran into Felicia in the hallway. "Oh, hey Dad" she said.

"Hello. Why are you still up?"

She shrugged. "Bathroom."

"OK. Well bed now. Oh, and Leesh?"

"Yeah?"

"Just look after that rabbit, OK? Sam and Tray were chasing it round the backyard this afternoon and it won't last long at that rate."

"It'll be fine. Probably needed the exercise."

"Yeah, not sure it works that way." She headed off again but then I thought of something else. "Oh, and Leesh?"

"Yes"

"Why is it called Bobby?"

"After Bobby Charlton."

"Who?

"Duh! Bobby Charlton, English footballer, played in the 1966 World Cup…you have no idea who I'm talking about do you?"

I shrugged. "Why not a Kiwi footballer?"

"Well for one thing, we suck at soccer. But, you know, I'm discovering my heritage." I guess I still looked blank because she went "Errrr, Dad! Mum's English!"

"She is?"

"Well part. Her grandparents were there for the '66 World Cup, don't you know this shit?"

I should have said something about her language, but I was still a bit confused by what she was saying. "Sookie's English?"

"Her family were, so therefore I am. Part, anyway. We all are through her. You really should pay more attention to this stuff. Why do you think we keep getting Yorkshire puddings and bangers and mash, and every time she's trying to feed us quickly she goes on and on about how nutritious baked beans are so they can be a complete dinner? Does any of this ring a bell?" Felicia stood there looking at me, looking scarily like Sookie if I had to be honest.

The food did ring a bell. I liked the Yorkshire puddings, but I hadn't really thought about Sookie being English, or part-English or whatever.

"Anyway" Felicia continued, "when I'm older I'm going over there to live in London. Like Mum did."

"Right, well that sounds good Leesh." I hoped like fuck she wouldn't hook up with some douchebag like Bill though first. Surely she wouldn't repeat that mistake. Weren't kids supposed to learn from what their parents fucked up? I liked to think that I'd learnt something from watching my dad drink his life away.

"OK, well 'night Dad".

I bent down to kiss her goodnight. "'Night Leesh" I said, and I watched her skip down the hall to her room before continuing on to our bedroom.

It got me thinking though; Sookie at least knew something about her heritage. I knew fuck all. God knows what nationalities were there in my background, I was never going to fucking find out though. I doubt it really mattered. It didn't really make you who you were.

And as I took my shirt out of the closet I realised that I was kind of glad that Sookie hadn't pushed the issue of where Pam's name came from again. She was always really curious about that. I'd told her it was my grandmother's name, which was true. But I'd never met the woman. I'd only ever met her namesake, the other Pamela. My mother.

God knows what possessed me, but the night we had Pam suddenly I realised that I forgave her. All those sessions with the counsellor and I'd got as far as figuring out that I was better than my dad and I didn't have to do what he did, but I'd still blamed my mother for leaving me. For leaving me with him.

But by the time Pam arrived I knew how fucking hard it was to have kids. How you had to really want them so fucking much to be able to put up with all the shit that came with it. And I knew that not everyone could do that. And God knows, my dad was fucking difficult to live with and I doubt he had made life all that pleasant for my mother.

And so I forgave her. I forgave her leaving me. She did what she thought she was best, which is all any of us do. And we all fuck up sometime. I just hoped she got her second chance. Because I got mine.

**Thanks for reading!**


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